I love this article by Elizabeth Su titled Your stress is not a trophy. The very first thing she touches on is family rules. Every family has it's own set of rules and reasons for doing things. What we grow up with we tend to think of as normal. Example: My Mom took care of all of the financials, paying bills, depositing income, debt management, providing allowances to herself and my Dad. I thought this was normal and how all families operated until I go older.
Ms. Su mentions how in her family being stressed was a sign that you are working hard and working at your potential. This is a great example of a family rule. Family rules are important and can serve an important purpose. I know in my family there were very legitimate and important reasons why multiple generations of woman on both sides controlled the finances. And I am sure there are important reasons why Ms. Su's family valued being stressed. However when your goal is personal self development you need to look at family rules and ask yourself if they are still working for your betterment or is the rule actually harming you?
Take stress. There can be a sense of pride in being stressed. I use to feel like Wonder Woman when I running nonstop and taking care of everything and being a superstar. But I was stressed out and my health was suffering. However as exhausted and drained as I eventually got I can still remember the highs I received for accomplishing some work project. That stress high can be addictive. Also being stressed is away to avoid feelings which at the time was another positive, or so I thought.
If you find yourself stressed out ask yourself what is driving the stress? Is it a family rule or are you avoiding some feelings. Maybe you think being stressed is the only option. If that is the case I would challenge you to dig a little deeper. Long term chronic stress is not sustainable and leads to serious health problems. So if you think chronic stress is unavoidable then it is time to re-think life and your priorities. Life doesn't have to be stress for all the the time.
I love information. I love to read articles and to learn more. On this blog I will be sharing articles I find insightful and helpful with regards to stress, anxiety, loneliness and other related feelings. Occasionally I might even right an article myself. I hope you find these posts helpful.